Thursday, July 10, 2008

Come See the Dirt that Isn't There!

Housekeeping is a funny thing. It's not like the work of a painter, where when he's done, someone says, "Look at the work he did!" No. The housekeeper's work doesn't show; the only work that shows for a housekeeper is the work she doesn't do. I was trying to double up some of my work so that the place is ready when Katie's friend Erica comes from California. It really does need some extra attention; maybe I stop short on normal days of giving it the attention it should get, but I do work through the day for the most part, or am needed for other things such as driving places, and I tend to only sit when I'm homeschooling with Tim, exhausted and need a rest, or have work that needs sitting, such as sewing. (Or blogging. Never mind; I do that when I need a rest!) It's why I wouldn't mind living in a smaller house. Maybe I could get it all done someday and say I have nothing more to do but sit!
So I do some dishes, and then the laundry, and sweep the front porch, and clean up some weeds, and clean some carpeting, and vacuum, and wash windows...but unless I told someone, no one would know that I had even done them. That's a little disconcerting when you're exhausted at the end of the day and the house still has work yet to do (which can easily happen when there's a young male in the house, and double for every friend he has with him). Still, if my focus is right, I can't complain. If I'm working for the approval of men, I will need affirmation from...Gary. From Katie. From Tim. If I'm working to please God, then I know He is watching the whole time and knows my heart and my work. The only drawback there is that my work is not perfect, and that sometimes I don't do it with the right attitude and maybe I don't do it even as well as I can. Then I know that He sees that, too, and there's nothing I can do to hide it. Knowing He's watching in perfect love, though, helps everything to be a rewarding task more so than if any mere human were watching me.
All the more I'm thankful that He knows my frame; He knows I am but dust. And He was gracious to save me anyway. Oh, do you know just how thankful I am to know it! Okay, I think I'm rested up enough now to go and do some more. You won't see it when you come to visit. It will be the dirt that isn't under the table, the smudges that aren't on the windows, the shoes that aren't scattered in the hallway, the dishes that aren't piled up in the sink. (Well, sometimes they are.) But today's will be gone, when you come to visit. I can't promise about tomorrow! And if you don't notice the old dirt that's gone, but do notice the new dustbunnies and all that have just arrived, then that's fine. It's not really all about you, anyway, is it. You might think so, because here I am telling you all about it! That's a conundrum that has me going in circles and I can't explain it. I just thought it was worth sharing, and that's all I can say. Ha!

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